But first, what am I ordering?

Coffee: Flat white. In order to properly rate the coffee itself, shouldn’t I order an espresso? Yes, purist, but remember I still need to take the thing to the park and drink it. If I get a -1 espresso, I’m not drinking it, so then I’d have to go without my morning coffee entirely. If I get a -1 flat white, I’m not going to enjoy it, but I’ll drink it. That 150ml milk can be very forgiving for a bad FW, while a good FW, on the other hand, will still showcase the shot without milking it down. And it’s not like I’m going to be providing detailed tasting notes – I’m just assessing whether or not it could be considered “a good coffee”.

Banana bread. Toasted, no butter.
Banana bread is basically 95% oil (actually only 15% oil) so press a good slice of BB against its paper bag and there’ll be a big, clear window to weight gain, even without extra butter. Now, a cold or room temperature BB is pretty solid. It needs heating to soften up all those oils and get that BB’s inner moisture steaming. Personally, I like a slightly crunchy toasty layer on the outside after toasting, with a perfectly soft and even consistency on the inside. The only reason a BB would need butter is if it’s dry. And it would only be dry if it’s stale or overcooked, either way, -1 ☹️

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